Talk to the parts of the person that aren’t being eaten by the depression. Make it as easy as possible to make and keep plans, if you have the emotional resources to be the initiator and to meet your friends a little more than halfway. If the person turns down a bunch of invitations in a row because (presumably) they don’t have the energy to be social, respect their autonomy by giving it a month or two and then try again. Keep the invitations simple; “Any chance we could have breakfast Saturday?” > “ARE YOU AVOIDING ME BECAUSE YOU’RE DEPRESSED OR BECAUSE YOU HATE ME I AM ONLY TRYING TO HELP YOU.” “I miss you and I want to see you” > “I’m worried about you.” A depressed person is going to have a shame spiral about how their shame is making them avoid you and how that’s giving them more shame, which is making them avoid you no matter what you do. No need for you to call attention to it. Just keep asking. “I want to see you” “Let’s do this thing.” “If you are feeling low, I understand, and I don’t want to impose on you, but I miss your face. Please come have coffee with me.” “Apology accepted. ApologIES accepted. So. Gelato and Outlander?”
P.S. A lot of people with depression and other mental illnesses have trouble making decisions or choosing from a bunch of different options. “Wanna get dinner at that pizza place on Tuesday night?” is a LOT easier to answer than “So wanna hang out sometime? What do you want to do?”
I will add that if you only do questions, then it can be really hard for me to trust you with emotional stuff. Don’t start with questions, either. Link sharing is a really the best bet, personally, because that tells me:
- You want to initiate conversation
- You saw something that reminded you of me
- You cared enough to show it to me
I do like being asked questions, but those can be extremely draining for me and don’t be surprised if I say no. Why I prefer talking about things that reminded you of me, because that I can talk about without feeling obliged to answer past “thanks”
A ‘Ring of Fire’ solar eclipse is a rare phenomenon that occurs when the moon’s orbit is at its apogee: the part of its orbit farthest away from the Earth. Because the moon is so far away, it seems smaller than normal to the human eye. The result is that the moon doesn’t entirely block out our view of the sun, but leaves an “annulus,” or ring of sunlight glowing around it. Hence the term “annular” eclipse rather than a “total” eclipse.
I’m in complete awe.
J. D. Salinger (via bl-ossomed)
Monica Drake- Clown Girl (via tropicalrainstorm)
Awakened Vibrations (via awakenedvibrations)
*hears first notes to Sugar We’re Going Down*
*punches out of casket*
am i morE THAN YOU BARGAINED FOR YET
you dont just play the sims. you go on a sims binge for three days straight then put the game down for 5 months
come fuck with a slept on nigga like me
*licks your pussy then goes to your parents and yells*
WHO THE FUCK MADE THIS?
WAS IT YOU?
THIS SHIT GOOD!!